In Beyonce’s Love on Top video, she sports a rather large and naval themed hat. Look here it is:
However, we don’t think it’s official uniform for any of the defence forces. Firstly because you could probably get thrown in jail for wearing the uniform without having been in the forces and secondly, them medals look like they’re made of tin. Sorry. And it possibly is just a “practice hat” for when she dons a top hat for later and it gets all glam.
Not enough pop stars wear a hat, but thankfully those that do wear them with panache. Let’s look at hats in pop through the ages.
One million years ago, the Captain of Captain and Tennille was a pioneer of the er, Captain’s hat:
L-R: Captain and Tennille (just to be clear)
But then he had to as he was a Captain and thems the rules if you’re going to commandeer a ship.
In the 80s, Boy George took charge of the headgear when he emerged fully hatted up with Culture Club:
He’s since never looked back and regularly wears the same style of hat – often crafted by milliners to the stars Stephen Jones and Phillip Treacy - but in different colours. Look here they are in green and red and with a FACE on it:
This is our favourite. Because it’s got a face on it.
Grace Jones likes a hat on her bonce too. Hers are usually quite spectacular but that’s hardly surprising: she’s Grace Jones, it is to be expected. Here are a few of her greatest hat hits:
She wore this on her last tour with a spotlight on it so it became a disco ball-come-bowler. City gents, take note.
Like she’s used loads of gel on her mohican. But dead neatly
A Zebra / superhero hybrid. A Good Thing.
Chris Lowe from the Pet Shop Boys has always worn a hat. Usually just a baseball cap or a beanie, but hat none the less:
But that’s just standard day wear. For more special occasions, they like to stand out a little:
Yeah, that ought to do it lads.
Slash from Guns N Roses has worn a top hat on and off throughout his career but then Axl went nut nut and sacked the band. Keeping the tradition of a hat wearing member of the band going, the current the lead guitarist in GNR is Bucket Head. Why’s he called that? Because he wears a bucket on his head:
Bucket Head. He’s great with kids.
Bringing us up to the current day, Cheryl Cole launched her solo career with the assistance of a hat, but like Beyonce chose a military one and again from an imaginary armed force. Maybe it’s a secret pop army that we don’t know about but these are coded symbolic hats that they wear to pass messages on to each other. In Cheryl’s case, we don’t think the trousers in the outfit were part of the code. If they were it probably meant “ABORT! ABORT! MISSION ABORT! SERIOUSLY! ABORT RIGHT NOW! DANGER TROUSERS IN OPERATION!”:
Cheryl with hat and terror trews
There is only one queen of the hat these days and that of course is Gaga. Yes we know everyone says she just copied Grace / Madonna / someone’s Nan, but come on, even if she does, she does it very well. Most of us couldn’t come up with such supreme feats of music / fashion / hat had we been off our pipes on space drugs for nine days. Maybe she was, but the fact she did it anyway means she wins. All hail the hat!
That rings a bell. HAHAHAHAHA etc
Not strictly a hat, but it’s a diamante Lobster on her head therefore is included.
Well, at least I made the effort…